Category: Featured 3: My Life

Little Oasis

Really love spending time in such places. It’s so good for my soul!

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Timeless Discovery

This post is being created for Mindlovemisery’s Sunday Writing Prompt.

Donavon has always been the quiet and stand off(ish) kid in the neighborhood. When he was a few months into his fourth year, his parents took him to a specialized doctor, in hopes of ” finding a cure.” Don’t misunderstand, they’ve always dearly loved and accepted their precious boy, though predisposed to a lifetime of teasing, mockery, and bullying. They just decided to try harder; to help Donny feel a bit more ” normal”.

He had selective mutism. There’s situations when he simply can not speak, though (without awareness of his condition) it could bring serious consequences.

Now, aged five years, Donny has adapted to his new normal. He has a few buddies, goes fishing and hiking, creates art from Arizona’s famous red dirt. His most favorite pastime is exploring. There’s many overgrown areas of the west that history left behind. Covina, his best friend, would read to him, the old books and newspapers they’d find in the dilapidated saloon.

On a particular windy and overcast Thursday, the boys were trucking down the dusty path, as they did every day. They were discussing the idea of dissecting a frog, without omitting any possible disgusting detail. In the middle of a sentence, Covina heard a sudden, yet brief, shuffle in the brushes. It was to obvious to have been a small creature. On the other hand, there aren’t other humans around this part of the path either.

Curiosity won that brief moment; and the two boys changed course. Initially, the shuffle sounded as if in arms length. Had it been a creature, such could have effortlessly reached out and bit one of them. With no such luck; however, they searched and searched for what it is they heard. Nothing!

Suddenly, roughly forty yards to the west, they heard it again. The boys wasted no time scurrying to the left of their searched path and continued for three miles.

The stone path seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. It didn’t look familiar to either of the two; but, that didn’t matter. The path lead right up to an odd, unground, and shabby hobbit house.

Photo Credit: Wikimedia

Neither of the boys knew this place was here. They’ve never heard any adults talking about it either. Slowly and cautiously, Donny inched closer to the door. He had picked up the thickest stick nearby, and prepared himself for war. There, six inches from the stone wall laid something deep brown and medium in size. He couldn’t tell what it was, so he reached down to pick it up.

Photo Credit Here

Covina slowly made his way over to Donny and stared.

“ How peculiar!” He voiced, starling Donny.

Donny’s facial expression was in agreement.

They walked over to the stone wall and sat. Opening the front cover, they saw a ticket. Train Ticket $7, Destination Unknown it read.

Covina turned the page,

” The train pulled into the station promptly at 7:07 pm…”

He clumped a small section of pages together and flipped to page 24.

” The train pulled into the station promptly at 7:07 pm…”

Again on page 36, 49, 73, and 104. The stories began the same but always ended differently from the journey before. The rest of the night, the two boys sat deep in the seclusion, reliving the tales recorded in this book.

“Maybe we should find this train station????” Covina asked Donavon.

Donny had that look in his eye and said, ” Vamos!”

Many Many Thanks:D

I just wanted to take a minute and thank these bloggers for their generous nominating me for awards🐿💚🍂🍃!

Just Bacon nominated me for The Sunshine Blogger Award 🐿🍂💚🙏🏼 Thank you for thinking of me!

Beckie’s Mental Mess nominated me for The Mystery Blogger Award! Thank you lovely; I can’t begin to express how much I admire you!

Thank you also to my dear friend and truly talented (NEWLY PUBLISHED AUTHOR!!) Darnell for his sweet shoutout to me:) Found here:D!!

Thank you, again! I’m humbly honored to receive such numerous awards! You all are so special to me!!

Happy Fryay!!!

Fridays, French Fries, & Yay!! What’s not to smile about??!!!

When there’s the rest of life staring you vigorously in your face, and you’ve barely had any coffee… This amazing article will pop in your head, and WHHAALLAAAAA, magically you’re a pixie dust fairy.

Kidding!

This article is super insightful, though; and, I’m sure will prove to be helpful.

Check it out here 😀

Pondering

When you write something, do you ever feel ANYTHING but neutral when the response to your writing is anything but what you were hoping?

I don’t want to say, and honestly I can say, my writing isn’t for self glory or praise or attention or recognition. I write to free myself of that which is my mind. I blog so I may help others find words they couldn’t before.

Sometimes, though, I’m disappointed. It’s merely from my interpretation of the result, and it’s differentiation from my expectation… still sucks.

Maybe time will change it. Maybe not.

Right now though, my interpretation is all I have … and the responsibility of it is all I want.

Thursday Thoughts

Hello everyone,

I’ve been trying to actually “blog”, for weeks, now. I’ve just felt uninspired and down right gloomy. Thankfully, I feel some of that exciting creative flow rushing back through my veins. It’s an indescribable sensation, the juices of nutritious writing.

I’ve been working through cobwebs of my heart and my home. Things that have sat for far too long, needing a final place to call home. Lots of “stuff”, ended up in the trash. If I no longer use it, after six months or more, it has no purpose in my life. The cobwebs in my personal life have also been cleared out. I have a great family life, and I don’t need to feel obligated to anyone and /or about anything of which I’m truly not responsible. The remaining treasures, I’ve kept, are beautiful. They’ll always have a place in my heart.

Here, in Cleveland, we’ve stayed inside while temperatures have risen into the 90s!! I can’t remember a summer in years being this hot. I don’t mind heat; however, I’ve never been a fan of humidity. The girls enjoy the patio, park, and playgrounds, usually. This heat keeps up, we’ll be at the splakshpad again, soon. It’s a fantastic place for kids to gather, and enjoy one another’s company. It’s a part of Cleveland, I’ve never seen anywhere else.

I’ve spent much of today, cooking for the weekend. Guh, these girls are so picky, and it stresses me out trying to get them to eat right. Anyway, today’s dinner is corn on the comb (my summer obsession this year, as if this happens every summer. 🤦🏼‍♀️ It sure doesn’t!) and parmesan pork chops! Everything smells amazing. Here’s the pork chop recipe.

I didn’t use the mustard and it still smells amazing!!

So other than that, I’m fretting about school uniforms, getting my car sticker for this year and trying to find time for self-care. You know, all the fun stuff. I’m so grateful, my daughter’s father is taking both girls this weekend, so I’ll be alone… Working on my mountain of laundry but at least I’m able to do it. That’s truly the gift, having the means to do it. I get on Pinterest, sometimes, and the images of other parts of our world leave me speechless. (I’m aware this is randomly off topic). There’s real issues, issues and concerns for survival, in other parts of the world. We who have commodity, should be ever so thankful… And not squander it.

That being said, have a wonderful rest of your day.

Good Afternoon, Evening, and Morning.

#SpeakLife into yourself

#SpeakTruth into your mind

#SpeakConfidence into your heart

#SpeakLove into this world

Spread Kindness like it’s all the world has left.

Namastè 🙏🏼🕉

Celebrating Life

As much as I want to scream “HEY IT’S MY BIRTHDAY”, and throw invisible confetti around,

… I just can’t. Yesterday evening was pure hell. Part of my day was spent arguing with someone about how I wouldn’t feel good enough in his “poly” lifestyle.. Though he’s someone I dearly care about.

A second part of the night was spent in even greater anxiety, with a friend who had suicidal tendencies. 😦 (Who am I suppose to call when I feel they might actually try to hurt themselves? )

And I ended the night literally sobbing while someone else grew irritated with me, like I was “tripping”… Full moon or not, friend slicing wrists would upset anyone. I think he (third friend, not friend from second paragraph) just had a terrible day and we just happened to miss each other’s call most of the day… So his irritation lead to misinterpretation of my texts.

For what it’s worth, it’s my birthday…. Could I have a hug please? Thanks!!

Working On Us – Week 6

This is my interpretation of Beckie’s Mental Mess, weekly “Working on Us” prompt. You can read more about it here🙂

She posted a few questions, as well as a picture (or two). Same as she does every week.

This week I was struggling to choose between the two photos, so I’m going to do the first.

IMAGE #1:

I immediately thought, on that’s simple… Depression is dark and the tree is signifying the way out. The more I stared at it, something deeper happened.

The blackened area is nearly impossible to navigate. That’s what depression feels like. There’s no light, no sense of direction. The darkened area is also enclosed. There’s endless darkness; and it feels like it’s going to swallow us up. There’s no hope, no way out, no running from it, no avoiding it…

It’s then, that depression leads to in bed all day. It leads to no showers for days, little appetite, all that is colorless, dingy, gloomy, and powerless. Our depression doesn’t remove what we have. It merely dims the light around it, with grief, lies, and black.

It takes deliberate persistence to refind that mustard seed of hope. It’s always been there; it’ll always be there. The tree is our roots, the center that keeps us grounded. It’s the truths that shine, despite circumstances.

This was a refreshing reminder that our circumstances don’t remove roots of our true selves.   

Gratitude Journal

I’m going to create a Gratitude Journal so I intentionally and consistently focus on the good in my life. Please feel free to add your contributions in a comment below.

06/21/19

  • Sunshine
  • Coffee
  • Fridays
  • Tampons
  • Pamprin
  • Incense

“Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.”

― Ralph Waldo Emerson

NAMASTÈ 🙏🏼

Working on Us- Week 3

Unfortunately, I missed Beckie’s “Working on US “, last week ; however, I plan to catch up. Here’s where you can read more about week 3.

This week, she posted a few thought – provoking questions and this beautiful photo.

A rainbow is symbolic in countless of ways. First, it’s a sign of beauty after a nasty storm. It’s a gift after my endurance through tears. Every rainbow I’ve ever seen has silenced my mind and provided a warm glow in my heart.

Secondly, it’s a significant sign that represents my LGBTQA+ Community. This is apart of my identity. It’s a collection of colors that represent groups of individuals. This minority community withstands so much grief and hatred simply because we’re different. The rain is a constant heavy down pour.

Finally, the colors represent psychological significants to the viewers. In addition, rain reminds me of renewed life. Water isn’t a bad thing; it’s actually essential to all living things. It quenches the thirst of our earthly friends, plants, and crops. It reminds me of nature’s way of providing needs to all that it contains. It reminds me that tears wash away some of my pain, and it allows for room to grow. My tears release hormones that previously had been absent.

Here’s the psychology of color.

Photo Credit: Pinterest

Mind Distraction

I’ve kept my mind focused on the good things around me. It’s become semi-normal again. I’ve picked up the hobby, puzzles, to work in the hours after dark, honestly the hours that remind us all of our skeletons. These require so much focus, especially with more pieces per puzzle. Each piece has a unique shape, and as they begin to connect, the outline of the pieces is created within the puzzle.

There’s a bigger picture of my life. I’m not too say which pieces belong, and which do not, which will fit and which will not. All of that’s been decided. I must live, embracing what I can connect, and accepting that which is yet to be connected. There’s reasons why things happen as they do, though sometimes we truly feel what we lose is a loss.

My daughters and I have had great fun thus far this summer (unofficially yet)! We’ve met many friends. We’ve exercised and enjoyed watching wildlife. We’ve visited the Zoo and enjoyed yogurt. We’ve been to see a movie, and more is yet to come.

Here’s a few I’ve finished. They’re digital.

Namastè

Tuesday Greetings

Good Morning Wonderful People 😀

It’s been a few days since I’ve posted. I’ve been reevaluating my life and future since this recent big change. It scary, slightly, because I felt my sense of direction has been removed. In a way, it has. Change rearranges our lives… And introduces us to new opportunities.

I had such a message sent to me yesterday, that’s inspired me to write a love story.

” If I ever saw an angel, it was in your eyes, for this I will sweep you off your feet and make God regrethe left an angel behind.”

Maybe if I do this, I’ll feel some healing. I’ll know someone has the love they deserve, even then some. LoL, does that make sense to anyone else?

Ok, my girls and I are off to do laundry and back out to the creek! 🙂

Have a wonderful Tuesday!

Namastè 🙏🏼

Your Belief is Your Crown 👑

I think one of the most powerful human capabilities is belief. It literally can change a life.

It saddens me how easily it’s influenced, how quickly it’s changed, and how destructively it’s destroyed.

It saddens me how challenging it is to regain, especially within oneself.

Belief is an avenue to identity… A building block in confidence.

It’s a sense of direction.

Individualism in it’s radiant beauty.

It’s something, I feel, we all should practice..

Frequently &

Unapologetically.

NAMASTÈ

Looking Kinda Blue

Photo Credit Attached

I’m feeling so emotional, sensitive, and blue today 😦 I’m certain it’s a bad mix of little sleep, crappy weather, and not enough time with my boyfriend. In trying so hard not to be sad or whiny or pathetic or sensitive. I’m trying hard to keep facts front and center so I don’t irrationally make something from nothing. I’m trying hard to accept where I am and not let this ruin my day. Something created this, but it’s what it is and I’m trying to just “get through it.”

How’s everyone else doing today? Tomorrow’s Friday!… Anyone with weekend plans? Maybe some positivity would do us all some good.

In a comment, would you please share with me something you’re thankful for or that made you smile.

NAMASTÈ🙏🏼

Morning Short Story ☕️

” I think this hospital is trying to kill me!” Zelda whispered to Rhemy.

” What nonsense. They’re trying to keep you alive. What makes you say that?” Rhemy responded with confusion in her tone.

Zelda pointed to the coffee cup sitting on the tray, ” That coffee tastes like mud in a cup!”

” Zelda!! Don’t be drama…” Rhemy began as she raised the cup to her mouth for a sip.

” Oh my mother goose of Neverland, this is horrendous!!! ” she added, after projecting the mouthful across the room.

dragon drinking coffee

How is everyone this morning? Afternoon and Evening, depending on where you are? Did you enjoy my little short story introduction? Hahaha Coffee is just essential. It never ever should be anything but a top notch expierence.

Here’s a funny story, this morning, I was eagerly anticipating a great deal find on a blender, while searching Facebook marketplace 😂😂😂 A BLENDER!! When did I get old where kitchen appliances replaced actual fun stuff? Haha. This blender would make one badass iced coffee though, and everything about that is perfect!

So there’s that.

Who’s having coffee?

NAMASTÉ 🙏🏼

Working on Us~ Beckie’s Mental Health Prompts: Week #1

What I LOVE about this idea is it’s our chance to express ourselves and our truths in a safe and supportive group. We are able to share without fear of judgements and condemnation. Thank you Beckie, for creating this safe haven. If you’d like to participate in the weekly Mental Health Prompt, you can find all the details with Ms. Beckie, here.

This image is her Prompt #2. I was intensely drawn to it.

The colors are bleak, overcasts of lingering dull clouds, with fruitless trees. The crows are swirling close by, reiterating the darkness and death like feel to the image. The trees are bare, cold, and naked, exposed. There’s prints in the snow, an aimless wonderer, with no sense of direction.

When I was experiencing the darkest of my mental illness, life felt everything like this image. I cared not for anything around me. I was alone, cold, and suffering, as if the world could see my labels. My ambition died. My excitement for life died. Crows swarmed my mind, waiting on the next kill… I wondered through days, with zero sense of purpose or intention. The overhead clouds were gravely thick, promising to stick around and make me miserable.

I felt trapped, lost, forbidden, forgotten, and alone.

NAMASTÈ 🙏🏼

10 Positive Things

This is a challenge by Bipolar Whispers. She’s asked us to list ten things we love about ourselves that’s not related to mental health.

Once the list has been completed, she’s asked us to link the post back to her original post.

I’m adding an addition piece by tagging 3 bloggers that I don’t know well, to participate if so desires.

10 Things I Love About Me

1. I accept individuals where they are in life.

2. I laugh at dry humor.

3. I love to learn.

4. I’m not attached to “possessions”.

5. I can grow of plants from seeds.

6. My cooking isn’t too bad.

7. I understand children well.

8. I teach my girls to be strong and independent.

9. My heart is so giving.

10. I am proud of my photography.

I would love to learn more about

Ellie @searchingforme7

Elly @theselfhelpful

Life with the breeze @lifewthebreeze

Pre-Pride Disclaimer

So, June is Pride Month! Speaking for myself, my sexuality is and always has been “not straight”! It doesn’t matter which it is, that’s not anyone’s business but mine.

Humans feel this need to judge what we don’t understand. (Oddly, the government is the least we judge but rather trust, and we don’t understand… Topic for another day.) My blog is a “safe place.” It’s for everyone. There won’t be any passive aggressive shit or fighting going on.

I am proud of who I am. I have been this way since I was born. I didn’t wake up one day, or expierence something (some idiotic theory’s going around that the majority of homosexuals have been sexually assaulted or abused, which caused a transformation.) that just “turned me” this way.

To all of you who question that, let me say this… it’s OUR life… our reality!! We had to accept this socially unacceptable life… as our truth. We had to step out knowingly how rejected and condemned we’ll be, and begin to live our true selves. If you think we CHOSE this life, as difficult as it is, then you really don’t understand.

My profile will support MY IDENTITY during pride month. If you don’t feel mature enough to “appreciate our differences” , then I invite you to unfollow me now.

ABC’S 2 Me

Always looking out for my own,

Addicted to coffee.

Building a better future,

Bathing in promising light.

Challenging myself to grown,

Changing with every storm.

Doing my best, mothering.

Detaching the toxicity.

Elevating my girls’ confidence.

Empowering beautiful souls.

Finding ways to “pay it forward.”

Filtering the negative from my blood.

Giving of my time,

Grieving the burdens of others.

Holding on to hope,

Helping animals survive.

Including self time into my agenda.

Igniting positivity into social media.

Jamming to new music.

Juggling roles in life.

Keeping an identity.

Kicking myself for bad parenting.

Loving others as I know how.

Lingering in moments of joy.

Making my mark on this earth.

Molding memories into my heart.

Needing a best friend.

Nearing a crying melt down.

Operating on a coffee diet.

Opened to meeting new people.

Pursuing a great job.

Promising myself a lot more.

Questioning loyalty of family.

Quoting the experts in success.

Rocking the infamous mom bun.

Removing the sources of stress.

Seeking a balanced happiness.

Seeing beauty in everything.

Treating myself to chocolate.

Telling the world my story.

Unwilling to fold under pressure.

Unabashed by my beliefs.

Willing to admit I’m wrong.

Walking this life alone.

X amining my behavior.

X ING out the chaos.

Yielding to life’s warnings.

Yearing for a stress free vacation.

Zesting my life with spice,

Zipping this to an end 🦋🙏🏼

Memorial Day 2019

This is how I spent this holiday ; my self care choice. I’ve lived in this same apartment for four and a half years. This is the very first time I’ve had the space and flowers to plant! By no means is it home and garden magazine material but I sure do love it!! 🌷🌼🌸

Thursday Thoughts

Thursday Thankfulness

  1. My boyfriend
  2. Twitter
  3. Opportunities to learn
  4. Relaxation
  5. Realization
  6. Endings
  7. Quietness
  8. Beauty of nature
  9. Clouds
  10. Rainbows
  11. Incense
  12. Sunshine
  13. Shade
  14. Cuddles
Anyone else ready for an adult beverage?

Don’t walk in front of me… I may not follow

Don’t walk behind me… I may not lead

Walk beside me… Just be my friend.

~ Albert Cumus

Photo by Chevanon Photography on Pexels.com

Destination: Cleveland, Ohio

Not long ago, I started what’s called a Traveling Blog Journal. You can read my original post about it here. Thus far, our journal had travel to Maryland to visit Kristian. Next, it traveled to Minnesota to visit Joy. From there, the journal ended up in Massachusetts with Heather! You can read about each destination on the page widget I’ve placed in my profile.

” Each person who is tagged, please tag someone to do the next post, and create a pingback to the original post ” (link in the “here” above)

I decided I’m going to go next, since there was a stop in the route.

I’m a BORN – N – RAISED Ohioian:) The hospital where I was born no longer has a NICU unit. The small town of which I was raised is called Bellaire ( just like Fresh Prince). It’s a super small industrial town, lining the Ohio River.

I now live in Cleveland, OH.

Photo Credit Attached

I never thought I’d live here… Or have ANY reason to stay here… Time most certainly changed that.

Some of my favorite things about home:

It’s richness of culture! {photo credit linked}

Restaurants of all kinds, from mom and pop stops to a variety of cuisine!

Garfield Mausoleum @ Lake View Cemetary{photo credit linked}

Cleveland is full of amazingly designed interior and exterior buildings.

Chagrin Falls, Ohio {photo credit attached}

There’s pleasantly just as wildlife as there is city life to enjoy!

Thank you for stopping by! I’m sending this traveling Blog Journal to its next lucky visitor, Julie!!

This Journey

Taken from Pexel

Sing to my soul,‬
‪The songs of your dreams ‬
‪Take my hand, and let me ‬
‪Fill your heart with my love,‬
‪Lead us to the sweet taste ‬
‪Of yesterday memories ‬
‪And sit with me as the ‬
‪Sunsets paint the sky,‬
‪My love… Let’s do ‬
‪Life Together
🌼

‪©️2019NovaNamaste‬

In dedication to the man I love ❣️

Mental Health Journey 15

Where to begin?

The order of events of my life never cease to astound me. I realize what I never do in storms, is this:

“Why me?! I’ve been through enough. Why is this happening to me.”

I also rarely stay in this mindset:

“God, here I am again. When something goes wrong, the chain of events in the same follow. Why can’t something go right.”

I know there’s an intended purpose for every occurrence I face. I know the occurrence is either teaching me a lesson of my past, or preparing me for my future. Nothing occurs for us to remain complacent and comfortable.

I’m thankful I realize I don’t need to be or remain idle.

I found this and it seems to be the significant message that Repeating itself on social media lately.

Mental Health & Suicide

I’ve been on both sides of this coin. I’ve earned my place to speak on the subject… And I’ve been given my right to speak up about the hellish nightmare it creates.

For those in pain, like David was, I understand you want the pain to stop… But, it won’t until you choose to live through, heal, and past it. Like David, you have access to a hotline… Individuals who WILL listen. You have access to complete strangers here, who DO care! You have access to legalized Weed in the event of unbearable physical pain. There’s resources available.

But, what’s not going to happen is your pain stopping if you choose to take your life! Let me repeat that, your pain WILL NOT stop just because you choose to take your life… It won’t. Accept it… Face it… Repeat it… Do whatever necessary for you to get it… Your pain, this immense pain and grief that you feel… That’s haunting you and robbing you of sleep… That’s stealing your joy and happiness… That’s sucking the life out of you… That pain… Will just be placed on the shoulders of those you leave behind… You’re choosing to throw the batton at them… When they’re even not in the race. You’re handing over your pain, expecting them to breathe and smile… And live and work and parent and be… When you weren’t responsible enough to do that.

I was 28… with an 18month old baby. He wasn’t thinking about OUR daughter… or the HELP THAT IS AVAILABLE! He overdosed… abandoning My Zivah! Suicide IS selfish! It doesn’t stop the dead’s pain but passes it on to the Living!…

If you hurt this much, do something about it! There’s options for you. No one else can make you, and no one else can change you… No one else can decide this for you, and no one else should….

#SpeakUp

#BreaktheSilence

#Suicideawareness

#NeverGiveUp

#BreaktheCycle

#ChoosetoLive

#ItsUpToYou

He abandoned his daughter! Every single day I’m excessively protective Of MY ZIVAH… and I couldn’t even keep this away from her. See the “survivors guilt” and “hurt pain and suffering”…. It’s hell. Don’t do this to those you say you love… Because suicide solves NOTHING!!!!

Saturday 💛 Vibes

Good Morning!

Today’s a new day.

What brings your heart joy right now?

To whom would you show gratitude?

This morning, my daughter and I fed the birds and squirrels. I was excited to see birds actually paying us a visit.

After we came back inside the warmth, we did a  step by step instructions of how to make toast. She’s easily flustered, and lots of information at once doesn’t work. She did well, and I’m thankful that we did it together.

I’m not sure whats in store for today; but I’m determined to feel good. Later, I’m thinking pancakes 😁

 

~💚~ Welcome to Mental Mingling ~💚~ Mental Health Awareness Month Meet & Greet! ~ Week #2 ~ May 10, 2019 💚

Please reblog this 💚💚 It’s important that we all have the mental health support when we need it!! These bloggers, myself included, are avenues to hope… Phone numbers, therapy strategies, positive affirmations, and people who will listen. If you’re a Mental Health Blogger, and would like to be added to the list, please post your Name, Blog Title, and link in a comment to this original post.

~💚~ Welcome to Mental Mingling ~💚~ Mental Health Awareness Month Meet & Greet! ~ Week #2 ~ May 10, 2019 💚

~💚~ Welcome to Mental Mingling ~💚~ Mental Health Awareness Month Meet & Greet! ~ Week #2 ~ May 10, 2019 💚
— Read on beckiesmentalmess.blog/2019/05/11/💚-welcome-to-mental-mingling-💚-mental-health-awareness-month-meet-greet-week-2-may-10-2019-💚/

First Thing First

Mental Health must come first in our lives? Why? If it’s off track, there’s destined to be a catastrophic event in the future ( whether that’s sooner or later!).

Accepting our mortality and imperfections can help our mental health. Understanding the importance of mistakes and the inevitable meeting with them can also help. We live every day, with endless opportunities to choose to be better. It’s up to us to make that choice.

Sometimes, life’s going to knock is down hard. We’re going to fear, and worry… Doubt and second guess. We’ve all done it and we will do it again. Thankfully, in such moments of Mental weakness, we have one another to lean on. We have others to share with and of which we can confide. They’re our soundboard, the fokes that can see the writing on the wall… When we’re blind to it.

Today, I’m asking you all for some positive vibes and hugs. I have a long car ride ahead of me, and a long seminar to attend. I’m anxious and nervous. Thank you so much ❤️

Prayer Request

If you could ask God to bless me with this specifically, I’d appreciate it:
For a stronger heart, to provide what I can to him, that will best help in his healing and rediscovery, at the right and best time. That’s my desire as well.

Thank you so much ❤️

My Mental Health Journey 14

Good Morning,

It’s Monday, May 6th. I’m home, in my head. Right now, I have too much time on my hands. Hopefully, that soon changes.

While I’m thankful for the following:

  1. Sunshine
  2. Warmer temperatures
  3. Good friends
  4. Coffee
  5. Singing of birds

I’m still carrying the invisible things, such as grief and confusion. For the INFJ, it’s not possible for ” let it roll off your back”. For HSPs, our emotions are rooted in our lives on a much deeper level. They can’t be yanked and weeded out just because they feel awful.

I’m dealing with a familiar difficult situation. This time, the gap feels like a continental distance. It’s early yet, but none of it feels good.

It makes me hesitant. It makes me cautious of my mental health and heart. It’s challenging me to constantly battle feelings that I shouldn’t be feeling… Because this situation isn’t his normal.

It’s painful. It’s isolating. I don’t know what’s going to happen.

This season is similar but different from the one before.

I’m not sure if this will be the last.

I just need some sense of direction…

I need some peace in this storm.

#CoffeeShare ☕️

Good Morning Beautiful People 😀

It’s little past six, May 2nd. The birds are up and chirping away. They seem to be most vocal before the dawn. Is that normal? Is it just me that thinks that? I don’t know.. There’s several different pitches and songs. I imagine the birds are preparing for babies. The last few years, the neighbors shutters held a nest of babies.

I’ve been up since five. I’m too excited to sleep. I have my love visiting this morning. I am beyond myself excited to see him. The last few days have been wonderful. I have learned he does remember bits and pieces, so he does remember me. Before him, things like concussions and PTSD were topics I heard. It wasn’t until now, that I’ve gained knowledge and some understanding of them.

Why do I say this? As humans, adaptation is apart of living… The more we know, the better we can work with new and unfamiliar. At no point in our lives do we know everything; and, we always have time to learn something new. On the daily, we’re reading blogs and Facebook, Twitter, watching GOT and the news. Our information intake doesn’t stop. What if we learned about useful topics, topics that already matter… What if we taught ourselves a second language. What if we chose to study the basics of the brain, or agriculture? I’m always hungry for new insight. I hope to have encouraged you to explore new information.

It’s now seven, and I’ve been trying to wake up and get this blog posted forever now. My girls are up, one sick (again!! Guh!), and the other one a bit still tired I think. They both look cute anyway. Zivah’s school year is almost over. That’s exciting.

OK, that’s the morning rundown. How you all enjoy your Thursday!


Two Words 🦋

So yesterday,

He said, “Hello Beautiful”…

And this followed:

Photo Credit Attached

” I’ve waited weeks. I’ve endured so much. The butterflies were ever more beautiful than before. Life’s so precious. Count your blessings, beautiful souls. You never know what silent battles others are facing 🦋

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🌸🌼💐💖Happy 1st Day of May🌸🌼💐💖

I mean N.E.V.E.R…

My Life is NEVER boring~

Many years ago, [Lordie, did I just say that🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️😂😂] { 5.5 to be exact}] I decided that, that, was the headline of my life. At the time, I was #firsttimemom with a six month old! I had NO CLUE what I was doing. I had no clue what I was doing married again, completely dependent on my husband, with a new baby, and unemployed. I knew I wanted my mom, more than ever; and, she couldn’t be with me.

As time passed, and my decisions took me down an unpaved, dark, and scary path… I kept going. I had to. Little by little, small victory after small victory, the darkness lifted. Zivah grew older, and I’ve magically retained nature hair color.

In 2016, our quaint superpower duo team became a trio! This biracial beauty queen came into our lives; and, I’ve never been sane sense.

She’s got crazy advanced sense ability. I promise she was speaking full phrases at a year old; and, she’s as strong as an ox. She and her sister converse with their own kiddo language. I referee the arguments, mock the tantrums (this is a very effective technique. It feels great and the kids laugh eventually?!), and pray for enough money to buy pizza for an easy dinner.

Now that years have since passed, my older daughter is taking life by the horns and attending school. It was an expierence, to say the least. The numbed one piece of (unsolicited) advice I’d give EVERY parent, is if you’re not satisfied with the school of which your child attends, speak up and do something about it. Our schools are to prepare our future generations for success. If they’re not meeting our standards, what are we saying to our children, by being passive.

My younger daughter is home with me, four of the five school days. We enjoy time together; and, her cuddles are the absolute best.

I’m now a WAHM (a whammy lol) (work at home mom)! Logically speaking, it’s the best position for me! Here’s the catch, I hate NEW & UNCOMFORTABLE! I literally worked down anxiousness for two days, about these 12 calls I made this morning. It’s typical for an INFJ to be like this. I call, after hours, to make appointments, just so I could leave messages. LOL🌼

Anyway, I hope you new followers know I greatly appreciate you joining me in this crazy blogging journey. I hope all of you remember the awesome person looking back at you in the mirror deserves love.

Hope to see you in my notifications 🌻🙏🏼💖

Don’t Wait

Oh how the years to by;

How days become weeks,

And those weeks into months.

With a single blink, the kids

Are grown, the house

Grew quiet, and life is

Fifty years plus.

Take this opportunity,

To listen to the world,

Dance to your favorite song,

Take that road trip, and

Try a new hobby.

Life’s too sort

For what if’s & could’ve been’s

Yucky Season

It’s a dry season

Alone & lonely season

Insecure and sad season

It’s a reflection season

Muted silence season

A sense of otherness season.

It’s an annoying season

Whatever, I don’t care season

Fine then, Unfollow me! Season

It’s a wine season

Cry and scream season.

It’s a retract season

Isolate and withdraw season

A “whatever” season.